NO SHIT!

It has been quite sometime since I've sat my ass down and typed what I really am feeling right now. All this time while away, the hols came and gone as though it never came. First week of school started and we're on the way for the second week. This is where everything shall begin for me. Study hard. Gym hard. I need to really work hard now to get my pathetic GPA up. Though no supp papers were needed, I had to admit I gradually became disgusted at my GPA. Who knew it could've been that bad. I will stick to my word that I will study hard. If I don't, then I shall dig my grave further. So much for studying, I need to burn off some fats, like seriously. I will make it a point to hit the gym for fitness and weight loss. I'm sick of seeing my body turn into nothing but a blob of fats whenever I look in the mirror. For the first time in my life, I'm feeling so worried about how I look like, physically.

Another thing bothering me has been the love shit. At the start of the year, a few of my friends broke up with their boyfriends or girlfriends. Now, just recently a few of my friends are attached. Intriguing thing is that, I'm still scared to step into the relationship field. I'm scared to ask because I'm scared of rejection. I worry that I am not able to handle any difficult situation well. For the first time in my life again, I feel scared. Those who know me knows that I'm never scared of anything. Some asked why do I have the sudden urge to want to get into a relationship. To be honest, I don't know. I've been too carefree to be bothered with anything else. I feel that I need to change that feeling. I answer to no one but my mother. Up till recently, I found someone. Shockingly, she is someone that many will not have expected it will be her that I have fallen for. She attracts me for loving who she is and not what she thinks she's supposed to be. She has her goals in life. She is neither plain nor wild. She loves the comforts of her home. She can cook. She never judges unless she has to. Treasures what she has. She is neither too pretty nor ugly. Neither fat nor thin. She might seem the fairy tale type of girl many look at. In fact she is, unbelievably. I, for one, wouldn't have known that things would have turned out this way. We were same class way back in primary school and I barely knew who she was. We were close until only since the middle of last year. Only problem now, she isn't ready and maybe so am I.

Peace..

Enjoy life for we live once only.