Learning to adapt..

Hmm.. where shall i start? Here I am seated infront of my computer thinking; How did my 2008 end and how did my 2009 start. Surprisingly, I ended and started the years with a new group of friends. Before my 2008 ended, I managed to get my lazy ass to Japan through the school's Japan Exchange programme. To many, Japan was the PLACE to be: a heaven, a holiday or even to finally seat on an aeroplane and out of Singapore. To me, this was a time to clear my thoughts. I had so many things to deal with in Singapore. I couldn't let go nor solve. Japan became my escape. I forgot everything and enjoyed my time thoroughly in Japan. 12months of persuing that one unreachable goal. Has my time been worth it? I barely made new friends nor wanting to get to know more people. I exercised every ounce of determination I had to get that elusive one. Many called me dumb and just wasting my time. Many said that it was a time where God wants to test my faith, my determination, my drive and my passion. Through this torturous journey, I've learnt many things: what we desire may not come true; what we hope to be may never happen. I've learnt to expect the unexpected. I've learnt that no matter how hard one may try, they may never get what they want. This tested my personality and my character: Am I a person who gives up easily or am I a person who is willing to try even though there is no success? I have become half-hearted. I want to let go but I still believe there is a chance. The only thing that could actually let me forget was a need in company. My good old friends have their own lives to live. Many are working their butts off while others have entered army. Finally I have actually found the real answer: I needed new friends. It is as simple as that. The Japan Exchange has allowed me to make new friends. They weren't like my old group of friends. However I had to adapt. Force out my personality and adapt to theirs. I'm proud to say that I managed to achieve that throughout the 9days we had together in Japan. They allowed me stop thinking about her. For once in 11months, She was out of my mind. I have always stressed the importance of friends in my very own life. This has certainly been proof of so. This post doesn't talk much. Its what I have been thinking. So piss off you have nothing nice to say.


·Peace™·
Cos' give our friends the love they deserve..

The Last Waltz..

I remember the time when the passion of swimming and soccer took over my life in Primary school. I remember sailing became what I loved for 8years. I remember that I made friends I would never forget. Most importantly, I remember a place where I've called home for 11years. Its not my house. Neither is it another house. But it is at this place I've discovered myself, that gave myself a chance to learn and develop myself. It was at this place where I've done phenomenal things : Breaking a law, learning vulgarities, found friends, had fun and found myself - an identity that will stay with me forever until a dying day. I remember that a person once mentioned that once you live this place, there will always be yearning to come back, a desire to relieve good, bad and the great memories of this place. Once a Hildan, ALWAYS a Hildan. Many of us students disliked that school. Why? Unreasonable teachers. Unreasonable school rules. Relentless givings of homeworks. Yet this phrase of Once a Hildan, Always a Hildan keeps coming around every once or twice a week. Everyone found it tiresome, naggy and loathing. Indeed, many did not like that school, also to a point where people hated the school. I admit i felt the same way because of several fantastic reasons. However it came to pass that I've actually been in this school for 11years. Within this school, I've known friends for 10-11years - Claudia, Christine, Amos, Jerrold, Shaun, Mark, WeiZhi, Zena, Rachel Tan, Rachel A, LingZhen, Wesley, Vikesh, JunJie, Jiayang, Pamela, Stephanie and the many others. On the 10th October 2008, it was a day a dread yet a day of excitement. For those of us who have been with this school since the days of Primary 1, we felt the pains of never coming back again, of missing this place, of singing the School Song for the last time ever. I cried when I sang that song. The song had meant a lot. For 11years, damn, thats the song I've known for a long time. Many asked, ' What was there to cry about?' . So I asked myself this question. My answers were found when we all, 5a and 5b gave the teachers 3cheers. To the front of me was my teachers who have guided me through my Secondary school life. To my left, my friends that made me feel homely and welcomed and loved. To my right was my Primary school. Tears indeed rolled down my eyes. I seeked solace in my own heart, asking, Will I really miss this place? I grew up in this place. 3quarters of my time was spent in Tampines, half my days everyday was spent in that place. Indeed I WILL miss this place. After watching HighSchoolMusical3:SeniorYear, I wondered to myself, I've long wanted to leave this place and I have finally did. Somehow I remembered a saying in that show. You might be ready to say GoodBye to that school, however that schoo isn't ready to say GoodBye to you afterall. Indeed it is true. I remember I had a walk on the second floors on the way to the toilet. 7am in the morning, i walked past the classrooms. I reminisced the times we played our hearts out, had lessons, friends being made in Sec1 and 2. I went up to the 3rd floor and I remembered 3c. One of my best years I will always remember. 1st and 4th floors brought back memories of 4d. Pioneer ThroughTrain class of SHSS, i remembered when all of us shuddered to think we will retain because of the untimely criteria of promotion. Then at the 4th floor where all of this year, 2008, came flowing back to me as if it was just yesterday. I missed everything.
At the start of the year, I blogged that this year will be a special year, a phenomenal year. Indeed it has been. The sacrifices, the heartbreaks the winnings. It has been 5years in SHSS. How to forget everything in such a short time? I then remembered that few people commented that the school's graduation was not much. However I beg to differ. For those who have been under St. Hilda's School for 11years, it was heartwrenching to see this day come. It was hard to come to terms with it. After 10 October 2008, we have officially become adults, young adults. I asked many questions about my time in SHS. Did I enjoy it? Do I miss it? Will I remember this place? I can answer you this questions - Yes I will. Till the day I leave this world, for all of my days in this world, I will remember forever my Alma Mater, St. Hilda's.

·Peace™·
Cos' ONCE A HILDAN!ALWAYS A HILDAN!

Emotional turmoil...

It has been..somewhat 2 and a half months since i visited this place.. I call it a place as this is where my feelings come true. There are no lies, no secrecy, no gossips and no immorality. I must be dreaming if ever there is such a world come true. You must think i sound girlish but.. I'm so damn serious. If you felt for me, something at the very least, why can't you give us a try? You have never entered love though you had occasional crushes. But if feelings are mutual and maturing, why can't it progress? I sensed anxiety and surprise. 8months and it still don't work and i believe i don't deserve it. You must have sensed the signals or else you would not even know that it is merely more than a crush. What more can a guy do to, other than impressing, get the girl to understand love, accept it, embrace it with willingness. You must have seen many failures of love but why not try it yourself? I just pray and hope i'm not just a 'very good friend'. I've done things out of the ordinary. I never picked up the courage to ask a girl out on a movie with other friends, make friends with her nor help her find stuff where she is in need nor ask a girl for a stayover at my place nor giving you a ride home late in the night even though my house comes first nor have i ever gone crazy over a girl before. It has been 8months since we knew each other. You couldn't make it when the Brothers of SA and alfred celebrated my birthday but your birthday is somehow etched in my mind. It has been out of this world whenever we are close.. Remember that walk down the beach when i proposed to walk you home? I thought there was an unmistakable sign for both us. You could feel it and i could feel it. Life goes on but will my desire in you last? I don't know the future nor do i bother about the past though the present shows danger...

Let nature take its course..

·Peace™·
Cos' I can't take it anymore...-o-''

Why So Serious? =)

After watching the Dark Knight.. i have come to agree with the Joker. I know he is a psychopathic motherfucking free-killing piece of joke that kills people for fun.. He shows how manipulative he can be.. turning the best of people and turning and twisting them and easily make them worst. He showed that even heros fall from grace.. And best of all...

Why So Serious, Son? Lets put a Smile...on that face..

If BatMan is the Vigilante everyone wants to be in their lives..why not put yourself in the Joker's shoes? He manipulates people..making everyone kill each other. But he shows that everyone is always so Serious..He's just trying to put a smile to their faces. He shows us that money is not everything..But your love for the people you love and hate.. that is everything...


·Peace™·
Cos' Why So Serious?

BAKA NACHIM!!

Hello hello. First of all, i wanna wish Selena Ng, james and shaun a HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY!haha.celebrating James's birthday was crazily fun..imagine you are the one always shooting jokes about someone and suddenly..you find yourself tied up and bound to the tables and people finally taking revenge while your are helpless?HAH that totally happened!!!dang James..you better appreciate that shirt swee and i bought for you!haha. now now..imagine again..class 5a soccer team : Nicholas(GK); Wesley,Zul,WeiChin,Dinesh(Def);WeiZhi,Izzat,Vind(Mf);Mark,Marcus,Shaun(Striker). What the FUCK right?haha its a damn good team!!BRING IT ON!!hmm if only we can stick it around longer..we can further develop and beat other teams..LOL!!
P.S : Selena..i SHOULD be getting your jacket soon..so DON'T WORRY!heh

·Peace™·
Cos' my head loves it..

White Chocolate Dreams..

aight its been years since i last wrote something in here.so here it goes..

soccer yesterday..DAMN!jason's boots aren't that bad..but the field was off.hah we lost though. many things happened on the field. had few moments myself but didn't really have much to remember other than being mega physical and quick thinking/footed. really tiring match. but i think..from what the rest said..this game was much much much better than the last time they met..hah.
hmm i'm damn effing bored. school was quite ok.talked a lot today.didn't study much.DAMN!haha.
ahh bored..

·Peace™·
Cos' its getting to me..

Soccer = Sailing?

NO MORE SAILING!ITS SOCCER FOR NOW!yes yes.haha.the plummer is away with junhao and elizabeth. so yea..time to slack off sailing for a bit at least! haha. anyways yesterday was a real feel good time with james's church people.not bad. some event and a "restaurant" called MusicInMyBackYard.cool eh?fine dining style.not that much but with the gigs..it was really cool.bit of chilling around was not bad either.then..
Soccer today.no at first was floorball?man i tell you..floorball takes the breath away from you.LITERALLY!!haha 10mins of playing was enough to make me wanna sit down and not do anything for awhile.!! anyways after that was field soccer. WARNING! : Those that do not have field boots and wanna play field soccer,GET FIELD BOOTS!if not you will truly suffer. haha seriously..even my tough Nike boots cant take the tough wet conditions.hmm next week its a match at Damai Secondary's field.Imagine this team:(Somenamesnotincorrectspelling)
Jacobson,Weijie,Kenneth,Darryl,Shaun,Peng,James,Me,Ratner,Timothy,Ben.WHOA!not bad eh?we shall see next week then..now that i have field boots.heh..

·Peace™·
Cos' my head needs it!